How The Pope’s Statement About Science Fucked Religion Over

pope
The Pope made a courageous statement supporting previously controversial ideas such as evolution and the big bang.
Here is why it's good, and also how he probably fucked himself in the long run...

The Holy Libel | Genesis

MANNNN, have we got a story for you! God creates the earth, destroys it, has a pissy fit, loves people, kills people...you just wait. You think your girlfriend is a crazy mother fucker? Check out this God guy....

Ask God: It’s Raining. What Should I do?

1_See_It

Ever heard the phrase “Save it for a rainy day?”

That was referring to masturbation.

Go for it. It’s a freebie.

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Ask God: Why Does Space Bend?

Spacetime_curvature

Well, if you had read my book, you’d know I created the universe… Here let me find the passage…

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Ask God: What’s Mrs. God’s name?

female-god

There is no Mrs. God. Women are icky.

That’s why I don’t even touch them when I need to fuck them…

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Ask God: If Jennifer Lawrence and Emma Watson are Women. What am I?

emma-kristen-jennifer

You are Kristen Stewart…

…and no, I cannot help your career.

Get a boob job or some talent. That’s how it works.

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Joyce Meyer Promotes the Thug Life in her New Book

Ask God: Do you hate amputees?

pegleg

Good question my child,

As you probably know, my existence is based entirely on faith. And I often get credit for healing people who were probably going to be fine anyway.

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Let’s keep it classy Joyce…God is watching…

Ask God: Can you roll a 7 on 6 sided die?

dice

Nigga please,

I once impregnated a bitch without touching her.

-GOD